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Saturday, March 12, 2011

My Lent Predicament

Ha. Kind of a nice word there, eh? Anyway, lent officially began a few days ago, and so far I feel pretty lousy because I have not yet committed to any kind of giving up. At first, I thought maybe could give up diet sodas and drink more water. Just had a coke zero this morning. What to do, what to do? Thought about giving up texting... I thought it was a pretty good challenge. Well, that ain't happenin'.

Then I took my mother's advice to instead use lent as a time for self-improvement. I thought about that and what I could possibly do to make myself a better person... possibly things like not being snippy with my sister, please God more when I know I should, managing my time better, etc. You know, kind of using lent as a second chance to make resolutions.

So one thing I thought of to help myself become better inside and out is to give up one particular habit that has taken over a part of my life so that it has gone beyond the definition of 'habit'. This is when I pick at my skin. Gross indeed, but it has become a not-so-secret obsession of mine. I have semi-permanent scars in countless places on my body now because of how I have so damaged the skin. This isn't a form of intentional, self-induced harm like cutting - it's much a form of OCD. It is truly satisfying to feel that release of tension from my fingers onto my skin, to squeeze and, yes, pop. Ugh, I really apologize for the gore of this. But I had to find a way to explain my goal to give this up for lent. Apparently this is called Compulsive Picking Disorder (never would have guessed that one, huh?).

Anyway, I am really going to sincerely try to stop this behavior. Maybe if I read this more often and realized how embarrassed I am to post this, that will give me some reason to stop. Not to mention the fact that some dipstick asked me about the "hemorrhoids" on my arms.

So tell me what y'all are giving up. Been hard? Good. That's how you know that you've chosen the right thing to let go of. PS: Soooo sorry for not posting anything decent lately! 8b
~sleepinl8

4 comments:

  1. Hi! Thanks for visiting my blog. And, to answer your question re: color of eye shadow here's a link to a post I did last year on that exact question - http://rmebathproducts.blogspot.com/2010/06/beautiful-blogging-eyes-have-it-part-i.html

    As for your post, please understand that it is not embarrassing but a brave admission. I sure hope you are getting help as OCD is treatable (I am a professional social worker).

    I am now following and I will be back to visit!

    Hugs,
    Jacalyn

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  2. Thanks so much! Will do. Thanks for following!

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  3. Giving up anything in the name of self-improvement is wonderful! I think a lot of folks give up things at Lent and make New Year's resolutions out of some kind of obligation without trying to do something that will better themselves or the world they live in. I think it's great that you are working on giving up that habit! As a former SI-er, I know how hard that is. Good for you!
    :)

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  4. Thanks so much Rain! Always the most supportive ;) Godspeed!

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